The Mind, Health and Wellbeing

Words Annabel Gold

Did you know your mind is one of your greatest assets? Mind, Health and Wellbeing Coach Annabel Gold, shares with us the raw truths of students' struggles during their early teen years and explains ways that we can detect and help to solve those issues.

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Most mental disorders begin during the ages of 12 to 24 years of age, although they are often first detected later in life. This age range is also the peak time for individuals to be in education, especially secondary school, college and university. Many studies have shown over the years that students at university level experience mental health problems. Common problems experienced by students include depression, eating disorders, self-harm obsessive compulsive disorder and psychotic disorders.

Systematic reviews have shown that emotional distress can lead to poor grades, decreased emotional and behavioural skills, social isolation, struggling to cope with academic load and attending classes. Such mental struggles also lead to dropping out of school.

Below are some experiences from students I currently coach, who have experienced mental struggles and are progressively getting stronger mentally and emotionally. All three of these experiences share common themes of not being able to express the mind, feelings of anxiety, pressures from school and parents, trauma from past events. Some involve being bullied in the school environment and feeling the pressures to fit in.

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Student at 15 Years

“From my early teens, a traumatic event took place, which caused resentment to grow towards my parents. I don’t care much about anything, my education, I can't help but act up. Sometimes I don’t go in or pay attention to anyone. It’s easier for me to fight everyone and be the class clown. I also experienced a lot of bullying from peers. All of these things have led to being kicked out of school. At this point, I don't care much about life or what the future holds. I find it hard to get attached to people, I would just rather go through issues by myself”.

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Student at 17 Years

“I became very paranoid about making wrong choices. I get anxious about the opinions of people around me, paranoia has translated into panic and anxiety attacks. I never voiced or expressed opinions, I've been so used to bottling a lot of thoughts and emotions inside. Most of my thoughts can be quite negative. What hasn't helped is that I had grown up in a toxic and abusive environment where I heard negative words. I know that a lot of my thoughts are based on past experiences and memories. As a student I can be so consumed with the opinions of others and trying to fit in that I become lazy and make excuses for slacking in my work”.

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Student at 20 years

“I struggled with insomnia and extreme anxiety in secondary school and now that I'm in uni these struggles have gotten worse. Sometimes, I experience a level of anxiety that would make me sick. There has been so much pressure from school and my family has such a high expectation of me because in their eyes I'm the good daughter. The thought of disappointing my parents makes me feel anxious and low of myself. Having people around me seems like a good distraction from hearing the many voices in my mind”.

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Here are some tips on how to help these mental battles:

• Expression - Learn to speak your thoughts to someone close to you, if you can’t say it out straight away, then write it out. Overcoming your mental struggles starts with being able to share those struggles with someone other than yourself!

• Listen - Understand that it is okay to have many thoughts at once, but running away and trying to distract yourself from them won’t help. Take time to listen mindfully without judging or making any conclusions. As you listen to them just simply write them down.

• Moving Forward - Continually come to terms with the fact that you cannot change the past experiences and memories, whether negative or positive. You can only change your attitude towards them, which comes through a process of development and understanding.

• Feed on Good News - whether we like it or not, our mind is continuously being shaped by the things that we see, hear, watch and do. If we want to be in control of what shapes us, it starts with first being intentional with what we feed our minds with. Feed your mind with good conversations that make you laugh and smile, read things that make you feel hopeful and contribute to your intellect.

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Overcoming traumatic experiences can be difficult to do especially alone, as hard as it may be to reach out and open up to another person, it is important to do so. As a student in secondary school and college, I struggled with depression and battled suicidal thoughts. My hope was having someone to open up to but there wasn’t anyone around. I was so isolated. My only way was writing. It was my way of expression at the time, until I developed friends I could open up to.

As a student, making use of the community around you would be beneficial, there's a reason why you have peers, mentors, even support services. There will always be pressures to fit in and be like others and this pressure will be experienced throughout our lives. If we can learn to understand ourselves and be comfortable in who we are continuously becoming, then we will not yield to these pressures. It is important to always remind ourselves that we individually have our own journey to take on which means that there can only be one you.

Annabel Gold - Mind, Health & Wellbeing Coach